What If….

Now and then I tend to think of random “What if’s”… What if cows could talk? Would hamburgers be as appealing if we had to listen to cows plead for mercy as they were being slaughtered.  What if cats had a cream filled center? What if saying “Pull my finger” was a means for war?

Today I was wondering…..

What if buildings were alive? How would they react to being torn down?





What if, Kermit the Frog was a vampire? Could he be trusted? Would he attack the cast of Twilight?… One could only hope.


What if Michael Jackson liked Vodka and Midget Hookers?


What if that glass wall at the zoo was not there?


….or had a crack in it?


What if the Devil was free to do his bidding? What evil would he unleash first?


What if I fell in love with a My Little Pony?


What if we could see farts?


What if I started working out?


What if I picked up an evil hitchhiker?


What if I got my hands on that little girl next door that keeps sticking her tongue out at me?


What if I were a Ninja?


What if I were a Jedi? Would I use my powers for good, or go over to the Dark Side and mess with my cat all day?


What if I were challenged to a dual today? Would this finally be the time I didn’t wet my pants?


What if I had the moves like Jagger?


What if I had some Macaroni & Cheese right now?  Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…


My Thoughts by Ervin Shlopnick – A Father & Son

I had my last child later in life. I was nearly 40 when he was born and I am 48 today. I still enjoy doing all the things a father does with his son… Teaching him to ride a bike, going fishing, playing baseball, and skipping rocks. At times I wish I’d had him earlier in life, so my stamina would be more apt to keep up with him. But, I do the best that I can… When he is a senior in high school, I’ll be 59. I’m not sure if I will be able to keep up at all then… But he will be 18, and can legally view porn…. And that is something we can do sitting down.h73FF8FDB