Sorry for the lack of Posts….

I want to apologized for the lack of posts recently. I have some perfectly reasonable excuses on why I have not been posting….

I’ve been very busy taking my dog to raves…

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and it is impossible for me to create posts until the drugs wear off.

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Because everything just feels wrong in the universe until they do…

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Plus my wife showed me her new outfit and I don’t think she was happy with my reaction…

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This is a peanut…

kvwFBOTThe aliens have landed, but I’m not sure what they want from us….

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I think my car is trying to eat me….

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Or maybe I’m just crazy….

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So while you wait for me to return…. Here is some Muppet porn to watch.  2DraDDw

Observations – 10/6/2013

Time for a few new observations. These are ones,  I had made over the weekend.  I promise that after reading this batch, you will have a new lease on life.  If not, well…. you’re just reading them wrong I guess.

What I believe happens when a woman discovers a new speed setting on her vibrator.

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I was looking through some old photo albums and found an old class picture…. Can you guess witch one is me?

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At the Hot Lard day care…. Two babies enter, only one will leave.

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I’m sure he is just telling her ghost stories under there.

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A Hot Lard fan asked me to text her a picture of my penis….. So this is what I sent.

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I really hate peeing after sex…

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Since the show was cancelled, the Planet Express building has fallen into disrepair.

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So….. This is Yoga…… Yeah, I could get into this, I guess.

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I believe that for some, this replaces Disney Land as the happiest place on earth.

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I’ve really started getting into art…

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This reminds me of those pee dreams I have…

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This is what it’s like for me coming into the office on Monday, after a week of vacation.

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Goddammit!!! You put clear and brown bottles in the same can again….

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Meanwhile, at Burger King…

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Physics wins again!!!

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The government shutdown has affected PBS particularly hard.

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Grimace has had it with your shit…

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This is quite possibly the happiest cat on the planet.

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You only have one chance to make a first impression….

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I bet this just scares the shit out of vegetarians… It makes me hard.

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I believe my house is haunted…. and the ghost does not like my cat.

You need to click on the gif to see it.

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The scale of success is not at the same level for all….

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Just finished watching The Notebook with some friends…

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Sometimes I weep when I think about our countries future.

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There is nothing quite like sharing a great view with a friend…

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I miss the days when, “Fly the Friendly Skies” really meant something…

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It doesn’t matter how sweet and sentimental the moment is….. There is always someone there to fuck with it.

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Is it just me…. Or is this a picture of a snowman committing suicide with his children?

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And finally….

You ever wonder what a horse sees???

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Just popped in to say “Hi”…. Oh, and here are a few other projects I’m working on

Hey all, just wanted to check in and let you know that the movie is going well.

OK, maybe not well… but it is going. Had some trouble with the local authorities. Apparently some people have issues with my film crew pillaging the small towns around here. Also, did you know that in some countries it is illegal to run through the streets wearing a pink tootoo and jelly donuts as a bra, exclaiming you are an angry God and demanding all the local virgins come to the town square for a SpaghettiO’s bath and spankings? Some places have no culture I guess.

I also want to take a moment to thank Shana for the great job she is doing. Because of her hard work, we are now a pay-per-view site. I figured I’d have to go back to showing barn yard porn again to charge for views… But apparently she knows away around that, and can make people pay for things other than porn.  Amazing what science can do these days.

Because of the great reception the Hot Lard movie is getting. I’d like to show you some other projects I have worked on or will be working on soon. I don’t want to brag, but I’m seeing an Oscar sitting in the Hot Lard women’s room trophy case in the near future.

KITTY WARRIOR

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TED 2

Some Late Night Observations…

It’s late on a Saturday and I’d really like to go the sleep, but my head is spinning from wondering about these very important things….

I think the “Ted” sequel is going in an entirely different direction.

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I don’t think the pink bear really wants to see Miley twerk.

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I think trying to change the Cookie Monster to the Veggie Monster was a really bad idea.

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I believe Handicapped Drift Racing could be huge!!!

1ZB82AxYou know you laughed at that and are going straight to hell with the rest of us.

I believe that people who are trusting, make life really fun for the rest of us.

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Boobies….. Boobies….. CLOWN!!! EVIL FUCKING CLOWN!!!

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I believe “Thomas the Train” is part of a secrete terrorist super cell, and this is a picture of him being transported to Guantanamo Bay Cuba.

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I think Donald Trump should get a hair cut before he drives his convertible.

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I believe the “Blue Screen of Death” is not fucking around anymore…

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I think this is what Miley really looked like at the VMA’s..

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What I see when someone asks me if I’m good at sports…

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What I see when I am asked if I watch women’s professional sports…

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Again, what I see when someone mentions Miley Cyrus at the VMA’s…

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I think my wife is trying to tell me something….

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I believe if I try to think about this picture too much, my head will explode.

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Where is your God now…..?

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I think……. I’ll do whatever Hypnotoad tells me.

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Click on the picture for the full effect