We’re a MEME?????

Check it out… we’re a Meme… Whatever the fuck that is.

Mr. Positive – Happy 4th of July

Mr. Positive says, “Happy 4th of July to you all. It was on this date that the great American forefathers, risked their lives and freedom to commit treason against the British Crown and sign the Declaration of Independence, so that all men could live free, be equal, and pursue happiness…. Of course the slaves felt pretty jipped about the whole thing.

Hot Lard Kodak Moment – Butt Sex FAIL

“Oh c’mon Clarence, don’t be such a FAG … it didn’t hurt that bad!”

Mr. Negative 07/01/2009

Mr. Negative says, “Why do buffet-serving restaurants Pizza Ranch suddenly seem surprised when you show up for dinner at 7:30?  Why do they get snippy at you when you ask them if more chicken is coming?  Why do they hoard the sausage and pepperoni pizzas in the kitchen warmer (for all the customers to see, but not touch) and leave broccoli, mushroom and pineapple barf sitting under the heat lamps?  I know the answer to that question… so the employees have something good to eat when they cattle prod the customers out the door 5 minutes before closing.  I swear to Gozer the only thing worth consuming at these establishments is the Diet Coke and sugar packets.“

Mr. Positive 07/01/2009

Mr. Positive says, “As a woman in the work place, you need to perform better, smarter and more diligently than your male counterpart just to get to the same level that he does. It’s not fair I know, but it’s just the way it is. But be proud of the fact that you are able to perform better, smarter and more diligently than he does and you know that your company could not survive without you….. Of course if you would have learned how to swallow when you were a teenager you could have been on the board of directors by now you stupid bitch”!

About Mr. Positive.

I’m sure you’re all wondering what the hell all the “Mr. Positive” posts are about?

Well you see, the attitude around the Hot Lard offices has been really shitty lately… (Geesh, you seduce one employees cat and the hole fucking office goes ape shit)

So I’ve decide to help the companies morale by placing these motivational posters in everyone’s torture chamber… errrrrrrrrrrr I mean cubicles.

And it seems to be working. Office drive by shootings are down .25% and it appears that only the weak are committing suicide again.

It feels really nice to do good things for your livestock… errrrrrrrrr I mean employees.

To see what posters I have hung so far, click here

Mr.Positive 2/27/2009

Mr Positive says, “A good employee uses the weekend to help themselves recharge, to be ready to go for the workweek ahead …. The rest of us use the weekend to help us forget our jobs and pray they don’t make us give a urine sample on Monday.

RIP Michael Jackson

Just want to take a moment to remember the late great Michael Jackson….

OK, IT’S SAFE FOR ALL THE LITTLE BOYS TO COME OUT OF HIDING NOW. HE CAN’T RAPE YOUR ASS ANY MORE !!!

Sniff… I’m all broken up.

Mr Positive 06/24/2009

Mr. Positive says, “A good work ethic and dedication are two sure-fire ways for advancement within your company…. Of course having pictures of your CEO covered in whip cream and Boy Scout troop 57 wouldn’t hurt either

Mr. Positive 06/22/2009

Mr. Positive says, “Sexual harassment is wrong… Unless they say yes”