My Thoughts by Ervin Shlopnick – My Daughter’s Hot Friend

I knew this day was going to happen, I was just not expecting it to happen so soon. My daughter brought home her first hot friend. Now don’t get me wrong, I do not want to have sex with this girl or any thing like that. I’m just pointing out a fact; this friend of my daughter is hot.

I found myself not knowing how to act around this girl. Normally my daughter’s friends are real ugly and so my actions to them are pretty automatic. I don’t trip over my words and normally the day ends with me punching them in the mouth and saying, “Get out of my home you ugly skank-ho”.

But with this girl it was different. Obviously I can’t punch her; she’s not ugly. Punching an un-ugly girl would just not be right?  Calling her a skank-ho at this tender age may ruin her for the time when being a skank-ho is appropriate.

It’s hard to be a father in these confusing times, it’s hard to know what’s right and what’s wrong when you are cohabitating with a teenage girl.

I do know one thing though…

Never, Never, Ever, Never, get caught standing over her wearing nothing but socks and a rubber ducky flotation device, while splattering her sleeping body with the blood of a chicken you just beheaded.

They seem to freak out over the simplest things… I’m so confused.

One thought on “My Thoughts by Ervin Shlopnick – My Daughter’s Hot Friend

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