Times sure have changed since Count of Flanders Butwheaty went to high school. Chances are slim that any girls did this sort of despicable behavior in the lunchroom when I was eating.
I mean, this is just horrendous. These girls ought to be ashamed of themselves.
They should be suspended for the remaining of the school year, and their parents should ground them until they’re 18 years old … at which time they should send the Hot Lard staff an email. If, for example, they were to email the Hot Lard staff, the Hot Lard staff would require a notarized copy of birth certificates and video confessions of both parents that both girls are 18 years old.
So, when the time is
legal appropriate, please let us know how you’re doing. We will be excited to hear about your grades and future plans.
Email us any time at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Good luck ladies.