My Thoughts by Butwheaty – How To Look Cool

Just in case you wanted to know, here is how you become cool.

Follow these steps, and you’ll be guaranteed to be super-cool and get all the chics.

  1. Let your hair grow to about 3-4 inches, all the way around your head.
  2. Apply gel and pull your hair outwards away from the scalp.  Allow enough time for your hair to stick out.
  3. Whilst your hair is growing, do not shave at all … let that grow out too.  Trim an awful goatee, leaving a small crappy patch beneath your lower lip.
  4. Next time you fill up your 1987 Ford Tempo with fuel, go inside to pay (versus pay-at-the-pump).  Look for the standard rack of shitty sunglasses next to the day-old cookies.  Feel free to donate a dollar to that missing kid.
  5. Once you have enough gas to drive to a Goodwill, go there and look for the most-ridiculous suit and tie you can find.
  6. You’re almost done; next, go down to your local courthouse and legally change your name to Judd Nelson.

You’re all set!  Good luck and happy chic-banging!

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