Posts Tagged ‘Britney Spears’

It has been some time since I last created a bunch of demotivational posters.

Many moons have pasted and the sands of time have sifted away like a monkey who has eaten 6 cans of creamed corn and has a rectal infection.

A lot of changes have come to my life during this time, some of which are joyous and magical, but most of which are make believe

So that’s why these posters will really suck.

Yep, they suck shit and smell like your grandmas pleasantly moist but over used panties

Of course you will view them anyway and go home with a smile on your face thinking you have been fulfilled with the greatness that is me. (Ervin Shlopnick)

Only for it to dawn on you once you get home that you have been jipped, realizing your grandmas panties are not moist or pleasant in any sense of the word. Oh and these posters are really shitty too. But mostly because your grandma has really smelly panties… And the fact that you are just learning now that she dry humps your pillow when you are at work. Sorry for that, but I felt you had to know… and it gives you a visual of how awful these posters really are.

Pillow dry humped by your grandma with moist smelly panties and not washed before you sleep on it, awful… Get the picture yet asshole?

Most likely you will have to wait a very long time before you get any really good demotivation from this site. When you recognize this fact you will beat your dog and burn your house to the ground.

So my warning to you is that if you are expecting too much from these really shitty posters, you may just want to move along to another post. Come back when I start taking this blog seriously again and do better work.

-

But on second thought they could be so good that they help you to earn great wealth and happiness.

I really dought it though…

they kinda suck.

enjoy

-

P.S.

Your grandma is a whore…

and I love her

poster5167233

0_61_kitten_two_faced_perth

poster5284440

1zofdye

poster27357850

6i4n6g

poster30037639

16ar1jc1

poster30789950

penitentiary1

poster397938491

5yf96d

poster50456026

1jvsbn1

poster511960941

4

poster66164801

20kyu8mjpg

poster86842790

yelcreamcorn

poster81189815

welcome_to_internet_ill_be_your_guide

poster99114606

17sr3r

I was in the mood for a good puke, so I decided it was time to go into the deep dark regions of Tinypics.com and see what they had to trigger my gag reflex.

Enjoy

fo15so

2znpqmb

adbtyb

4kd2nol

2m863hw

6a00d8345357ef69e200e54f9e42b88834-800wi

2qd5ok8

ogi7tc

302teop

2igkgh0

10pr3fr

id55vt

2ah9zdd

2s1llw5

6r7n6v

25rpk4m

66uybtc

25at6o1

302x4d5

309hvo91

k2e4ua

2mcgg38

bebqds

It’s only after I take a really good look at humanity in its truest form, I realize that as a species…

We’re all fucked.

xeopdy

Now that we are able to do polls, I thought I would try one out.

It is getting close the the presidential election and there are still a lot of undecided voters out there. So my question to you is…

We here at Hot Lard want to thank you for stopping by. And we NEVER want you to leave.

NEVER…

EVER…

We will hunt you down, find you and drag you back kicking an screaming.

Have a great day.

The Math of Women

Posted: September 15, 2008 by Ervin Sholpnick in Hotties, Humor, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , ,

“Whatever you give a woman, she’s going to multiply. If you give her
sperm, she’ll give you a baby.  If you give her a house, she’ll give you
a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.  If you give
her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.  So – if you give her any crap, you will receive a ton of shit.”

Love and appreciate all the women in your life. Or else!

I knew I should have taken the train!

I believe everyone should chip in to help save the environment. It will only work if we all do it together.

I’m saving trees and water by not wiping my ass or washing my hands after I take a shit.

I giggle when I shake peoples hands.

OK, so bums like us… Someone has to keep them drunk.

Thanks to my hay fever, I’m too stuffed up to sleep or think straight, so I decided to surf the net. And that’s how I came up with this really shitty demotivational poster.