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Installing a Husband

Dear Technical Support Group,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as:

• Romance 9.5 and
• Personal Attention 6.5,

and then installed undesirable programs such as:

• NBA 5.0,
• NFL 3.0
• Golf Clubs 4.1.

Also Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

——————

Dear DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command:

>>ithoughtyoulovedme.html

and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and  Flowers 3.5.  However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to  Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.  You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.

We recommend:

• Cooking 3.0
• Hot Lingerie 7.7

Good Luck!
Technical Support Group (TSG)

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Microsoft Technical Support

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.

The Personnel Manager said, “Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one.  Unless you pass it, you cannot qualify for this job.”

Mujibar said, “I am ready.”

The manager said, “Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green.”

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, “Mister manager, I am ready.”

The manager said, “Go ahead.”

Mujibar said, “The telephone goes green, green, and I pink it up, and say, ‘Yellow, this is Mujibar.’”

Mujibar now works at a Microsoft Technical Help Center.

No doubt you have spoken to him.  I know I have.

I thought about categorizing this as under jokes, but the joke isn’t funny anymore.

240/240

Source

Address 240

Group 240

What a dumb ass!