My Thoughts by Ervin Shlopnick – Public Restrooms

I’ve been told that public restrooms are a breeding ground for germs.

That doesn’t seem right to me…

I believe that anyone should be allowed to breed in them.

Mr. Positive 04/20/2010

Mr. Positive says, “Running a marathon is like baking a cake. No matter how tired you get.. there is cake at the end”.

Demotivational Posters – Running is Dumb

Running sucks…

It’s just dumb! Why the fuck run when you can walk or drive and get where you are going and not be out of breath.

Here’s few reasons why running is so dumb.

We’re Away…

Click picture

Mr. Positive 07/17/2009

Mr. Positive says, “Remember, after making a statement, a good manger will always make time to listen to the response of their employees….. But before you say anything, I need to go take a massive dump”.

Mr. Positive 07/16/2009

Mr. Positive says, “I think…. No wait, I believe…. Wait…. hmmmm I give up”.

Mr. Positive 07/13/2009

Mr. Positive says, “Sometimes you have to look defeat square in the eye and say… You win”.

Mr. Negative 07/01/2009

Mr. Negative says, “Why do buffet-serving restaurants Pizza Ranch suddenly seem surprised when you show up for dinner at 7:30?  Why do they get snippy at you when you ask them if more chicken is coming?  Why do they hoard the sausage and pepperoni pizzas in the kitchen warmer (for all the customers to see, but not touch) and leave broccoli, mushroom and pineapple barf sitting under the heat lamps?  I know the answer to that question… so the employees have something good to eat when they cattle prod the customers out the door 5 minutes before closing.  I swear to Gozer the only thing worth consuming at these establishments is the Diet Coke and sugar packets.“

Mr Positive 06/24/2009

Mr. Positive says, “A good work ethic and dedication are two sure-fire ways for advancement within your company…. Of course having pictures of your CEO covered in whip cream and Boy Scout troop 57 wouldn’t hurt either

The End of the Race Card

It’s official!  Now that Barack Obama will be the 44th President of the United States of America, people of all minority types will forever be banned from using the “race card” to explain why they:

• can’t get a job
• are oppressed in the workplace
• are discriminated against
• shoot a rival gang member
• joined a gang

Do you hear that?  Now that a black man can become the President of the United States of America, the next time I hear about the “black man” or “hispanic” or “jew” or “redneck” or “Polack” or “native american/indian” whining and bitching about being held back due to race, you deserve to die should move to France because you are a lazy piece of fucking shit who wants a handout from your government … namely, Barack Obama.  He will gladly take the money your neighbor brings home and redistribute it to you.

Want national healthcare?  Barack will make it happen, along Nancy Pelosi.  They’ll give you as much as you need from people with jobs and a decent income.

However, once you get on your feet (if you do decide to stop smoking crack) and get a job… welcome to the real world.  Now YOU’LL be paying into the system and supporting your fellow lazy-ass American (or immigrant) with your wages.  And guess what?  Maybe … just maybe you’ll wake up and stop supporting Socialism Liberals.  Maybe next time, you’ll vote for smaller government and more liberties.  And don’t debate me on this because you know I’m right.

Oh wait, I’m going off on a tangent.  My bad.

I guess maybe the race card issue isn’t dead… maybe since Barack Obama isn’t 100% black (both mom and dad are black), that won’t be good enough for 100% ethnic minorities, if and when the issue presents itself.