We Salute You, Black Bartender

There is a guy out there, an actor-slash-dancer, who deserves some serious recognition.  I wish I knew his name; sadly all I know about him is that he dances in Rick Astley’s timeless classic Never Gonna Give You Up music video.

Here he is at the beginning of the video; he’s really getting down with the song.

Over on Wikipedia, here’s what they say about him:

In the music video, Astley sings and dances to the song in various venues, sometimes interlaced with backup dancers. A bartender has a notable presence in the video, as his behavior gradually shifts from casually noticing Astley’s singing to being fully engrossed in the song with energetic acrobatic moves. Venues range from a restaurant to several outdoor areas.

Oh how I wish I knew this fellas name so we could give him the proper recognition he deserves.  If anyone knows, let us know!

Here’s the music video for your viewing pleasure.

My Thoughts by Ervin Shlopnick (Rectal Itch Charlie)

If the creators of the Care Bears came up with a new character and called it “Rectal Itch Charlie” and he looked liked THIS.

I’m not sure the entire product line would be as appealing to children as it is now. Sometimes it’s a good thing to not improve on the original.

Being Sick

Question: Do you know what the greatest thing about being sick is (besides not having to go to work)?

Answer: Knowing that your mouth looks like this:

Life truly becomes meaningless when you feel this bad.  Even the mere thought of having the house to yourself so that you could potentially play video games all damn day long doesn’t even sound appealing.

Simply getting out of bed to piss causes earthquakes and volcanoes to simultaneously erupt in spectacular fashion in your head.

When the phones rings, it’s bad enough … however, when your caller id says “FLORIDA” as the caller, you get extra-pissed that you even got out of bed to look to see who was bothering you.

Caller (Indian voice): Hi there, this is Nancy calling from Citi Credit … is <my name> there?
Me: Go fuck yourself and take me off your list.
Caller (still talking as I told her to go fuck herself): We have a fabulous offer for credit card users to transfer their higher interest rate cards to Citi … CLICK!

Vital necessities, such as water and bread, are impossible to squeeze past through raw throat.  Swallowing is impossible.  Yelling at the dog to shut the fuck up when the garbage men come is excruciatingly painful.

Having to take crap from coworkers who DIDN’T get the free flu shot at work is equally painful.  Although, there is some sense of relief when you find out your ailment isn’t the flu, but it doesn’t help that it feels like the flu, only worse.

Hot Lard Kodak Moment – Love at First Sight

I knew from the first moment I laid eyes on her.

I had to have her….